Matrix 7 - What a sh!thole!

After quickly recovering from his short time in hospital, Mr. Adamson was now wondering what to do next, when his phone rang again. he was extremely careful in retreving it from his pocket. when he answered his phone, there was a grumbling, mumbling wreck on the other end. thats right it was mr. R.

"Calm down mr. R remember what i told you about skin failure?" Mr. R replies with grumbing.
"Whats the matter mr. R?" Asked Mr. Adamson.
"ARRRH, shit, ARRH pond, arrh ca, arrh agent M." said a confused upset Mr. R

Mr. Adamson was now angered at the thought of agent m. copying his idea of driving a car into Mr. R's pond and then shitting in it.

"Where are you Mr. R?" was Mr. Adamson's response.
"13 Oakbridge drive, a.k.a. Mr. R's new house, I moved house because agent M. shat in my pond."
"Sounds nice"
"Prepare to be surprised."
"Okay I'm on my way."

Fifteen minutes later Mr. Adamson arrived at the end of Mr. R's street. He was greeted by Mr. R. Pretending not to be responsible for the crimes Mr. Adamson said:

"Wow Mr. R what a nice neighbourhood! who did you have to kill to get a place like this?" Mr. Adamson asks jokingly.
"I think his name was Kelly" Mr. R replied seriously, Mr. Adamson looks unfomfortably at Mr. R. "I'll take you on a tour of my home."

Mr. R led Mr. Adamson down a posh street onto a piece of wasteland with half a sunken shed on it.

"Gee, I feel sorry for the silly bugger that bought that shit little allotment" Mr. Adamson said to Mr. R. Now looking depressed Mr. R said:
"It isn't an allotment. It's my house." Mr. Adamson went red with embarasement. "So this is the tour of my house," Mr. R says as he opens the shed door "Here is my bedroom, living room, kitchen and bathroom" Mr. R indicated.
"But Mr. R it's just the inside of a shed, where's your bed and toilet?" asked Mr. Adamson

"The bed's the wall, and the toilet's the damp spot in the corner," Mr. Adamson quickly leeps from the damp corner which he was standing in. "Now let me show you the pond." they walk outside.
"Here's the pond" points Mr. R.
"But, it's a FUCKING SWAMP!" shouts Mr. Adamson.

"Oh Mr. Adamson mind the quicksand"
"shit, shit, shit, shit!" screams Mr. Adamson as he slowly sinks into the ground.

Mr. Adamson sinks to a point with just his head and shoulders sticking out.
"what happened? why did I stop sinking?" ask's Mr. Adamson.
"Kids kept going in and dieing so the council demanded that I put concrete at the bottom and put a sign up" Pointing to a sign. On it was writen

Warning: Quicksand can cause death, This sand contains small bits: keep away from small children under 3, big children under 3 can play all they want.

Mr. Adamson walks out.
"Shit I've got sand everywhere, even in my ..."
"Okay, Okay I get the picture" interupts Mr. R
"I was going to say pockets, Mr. R are you going to have your home done up?"
"Yes, while it being done up can I stay with you?"
"Are you coming onto me? because you know that I've only got a one bedroom flat with a single bed"
"Where can I stay then?"
"I suggest going to see father architect, as he knows all the answers"

The next chapter of the Mr. Adamson Adventures is out, Why not read chapter 8?